Am I getting to be that age?

 

Am I getting to be that age?

Today I was in a store that sells sunglasses and only sunglasses. A young lady walks over to me and asked, "what brings you in today?" I looked at her, and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator."

She didn't quite know how to respond.

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When people see a cat's litter box they always say, “Oh, have you got a cat?”

Just once I want to say, “No, it's for company!”

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Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, “An ambulance.”

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I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. Since I can't afford one, I'm wearing my garage door opener.

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I thought about making a fitness movie for folks my age and call it;

“ Pumping Rust ”.

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I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball but you are just too tired to bounce it.

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Birds of a feather flock together and then poop on your car.

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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older.
Then it dawned on me ….
They were cramming for their finals.

As for me, I'm just hoping God grades on the curve.

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The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

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The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

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Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL?

Cool! But for eighty (80) its LXXX!

Not sure I want to live that long!

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The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

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Did you ever notice: When you put the words “The” and “IRS” together they spell “Theirs”?

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Aging:

Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

I'm already there!

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Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me. I want people to know why I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

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And so it goes...

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